Bargain Wisely

"I bargained with Life for a penny,
And Life would pay no more,
However I begged at evening
When I counted my scanty store.

"For Life is a just employer,
He gives you what you ask,
But once you have set the wages,
Why, you must bear the task.

"I worked for a menial's hire,
Only to learn, dismayed,
That any wage I had asked of Life,
Life would have willingly paid."
-Jessie Belle Rittenhouse
(taken from Think and Grow Rich by Napolean Hill)

New Zealand

i remember vividly the phone call that i got from my brother, that one fine evening, last last year when i was in New Zealand. he called right after he spotted the picture i posted on facebook. my 21st bday, visit to the whorehouse strip club, lipstick stains on my boob and all. he was quite shocked and he thought someone else updated those pictures of mine. i still remember my reaction to his surprise, i was defensive. i was quite irked at being called up at random and questioned about what pictures i took and what i posted on facebook. i guess i must have sounded a lil too defensive when he retreated, no more questioning.

ahhh... New Zealand, the freedom, the lack of care. the love i got across continents. :)

tiny thoughts and mini rushes

contrary to popular belief,

i am actually quite immature.

confession no. 1107

it need not be far

Don’t fear failure so much that you refuse to try new things. The saddest summary of a life contains three descriptions: could have, might have, and should have.
– Louis E. Boone

where do you think is the closest heaven on Earth for you? the bedroom, the workstation, the great raw outdoors, the beach, underwater, in the middle of the green field?

for me, sometimes would be the bedroom, other times would either be the wilderness or the workstation. yeah, i sometimes find peace buried in work, escapade,sorta. the wilderness where noone knows me, noone can find me, noone is able to trace me.. the sense of anonymity. independence and survival.

where's your heaven on Earth?

panic

seen a panic tortoise, turned upside down, just inches away from the food? me, right now, that tortoise

tumblr is taking over my life, again

via stuffnoonetoldme

yes it does

sex sells

i have never doubted this

FUCK!!!!

my file decide to go MIA on me...

FUCK MY LIFE!

DO NOT add 'un' into 'certainty'

no, it's not easy. yes, it's definitely a struggle. i've contemplated to walk away, countless times. pride stopped me. i cannot quit my current chosen job, not with nothing in sight yet. maybe, maybe it is easier to let go when nothing solid is built, yet? no, i cannot let my clients down. problem is, the paradigm shift from employment to doing your own things takes longer than expected (and needed) for me. was way too comfortable doing routine jobs, finish up tasks given by boss, completing expected workloads and go off for the day. quietly anticipating the arrival of Fridays and dread the fast appearance of Mondays. my life has been far too comfortable.

i'm feeling the pinch of slow income building. feeling the pain of needing to adjust, manage my own time and workloads. it's all still quite a blur, management skills still suck, paperwork fails me. i am clearly a person who prefers to go out dancing (figuratively) than sitting in the office, writing reports on the different steps and techniques of a dance routine.

weird how when i am slowly beginning to settle down, other job opportunities show themselves. client i went to see offered me a job, my ex boss asked me to have a think of going back, and lina from jobstreet sent me interview requests. funny how life works, aint it? i know better, it's a test. a test of the will, a test of the perseverance, a test of character.

everything happens for a reason. it's like how i blindly stumble into Prudential, i always knew deep inside of me, it has a deeper meaning and a bigger picture to it. it's like how i got to know so many new friends by chance, and make effort to keep in contact, by choice. perks of the job, really.

am i tough? i better be